The last time we saw R & G, we were told something that shook us to the core: their grandparents had made it clear to them, “You’ll never live with your parents.” Hearing those words come from children who deserve to feel safe and loved was devastating. But what struck us even more deeply was the silence that followed—an unsettling silence that revealed far more than we could have anticipated.

When we asked G simple, everyday questions, his response was filled with hesitation. After a long pause, he quietly admitted, “I need permission to tell you things.” As his stepmom, this was particularly heartbreaking for me. I’ve always wanted to be a source of comfort and trust for Roman and Gianni, but that day, I saw the fear in his eyes—a fear that had been instilled by those who are supposed to care for him. It wasn’t just a reluctance to speak; it was the realization that he had learned to silence his own voice, to hide his truth from us.

This moment was not isolated. Over time, we have witnessed a growing pattern of manipulation and control designed to alienate them from their father and me. Their grandparents’ words and actions are part of a deliberate attempt to drive a wedge between them and the family we are trying to build. They boys are being taught, directly or through constant insinuations, that we are somehow less important to them—that their connection to us is conditional or even harmful.

Recently, their grandparents have begun claiming that even their mother isn’t ready to care for them, positioning themselves as the only ones fit to raise the boys. But this couldn’t be further from the truth.

What makes this even more painful is knowing that the grandparents aren’t even the primary caregivers. For as long as we can remember, they have relied on hired nannies to care for Roman and Gianni. The truth is, Dante and I are the only ones who have consistently spent long, uninterrupted hours of undivided time with the boys. We’ve nurtured them, played with them, and provided the emotional presence that they desperately need. Meanwhile, the grandparents—who claim that no one else is ready to care for them—delegate that very responsibility to others.

It’s clear to us that this is about more than just care. It’s about control. The grandparents’ narrative—that their mother isn’t ready and that we will never have the boys—serves their agenda of keeping Roman and Gianni under their thumb. Yet, their actions show a lack of genuine investment in the boys’ well-being. They hire others to handle the day-to-day responsibilities of parenting, all while making decisions that sever the boys’ natural connection to their father and me.

The boys are being pulled into a world where their every move and thought is monitored, where they are taught that their relationship with us is conditional. They are being conditioned to believe that loving us, their father and stepmom, is something wrong—something they must hide or seek permission to express.

The time we’ve spent with themhas shown us their true spirits—the joy they hold when they’re free to be themselves. But under their grandparents’ care, that light is dimming. They are being taught to hold back, to question their feelings, and to view their bond with us as something to be afraid of. We have witnessed their confusion, their hesitation, and their growing sense of isolation.

The claim that no one else is ready to care for the boys is not only untrue—it’s harmful. The grandparents, who claim to be the only ones fit to raise the kids, are the very ones who outsource that care. Meanwhile, the boys’ emotional needs are being neglected, and their right to feel connected to their parents is being stripped away.

As if the emotional manipulation and control weren’t enough, we now face a new, heartbreaking reality. Our boys’ great-great-grandmother Bunny has passed away, a woman who held such a special place in our family’s history and in our hearts. But instead of allowing them to attend her funeral and pay their respects, the grandparents are acting as if it might be a problem. They have used the fact that we haven’t seen the boys in so long as an excuse, creating a barrier even in a moment that should be about family unity and healing.

This is not just a matter of attending a funeral—it’s about keeping them disconnected from the family that loves them. It’s about denying them the opportunity to honor a part of their heritage, to grieve alongside us, and to be a part of something so important to their history.

Bunny was not just a great-great-grandmother to the boys—she was a link to their roots, a connection to their past. But instead of allowing them to be present at this significant moment, the custodians are keeping them at a distance, once again exerting control over something that should never be about power.

Funerals are moments of closure, remembrance, and love, and it is devastating to know that theymay be kept from experiencing that. This is just another example of how the grandparents’ actions are designed to isolate the boys, not just from us but from the wider family network that they belong to. It is yet another way they are being denied the love, connection, and emotional support that they need.

We had hoped that, at the very least, they would allow the boys to attend and to be part of this important family moment. But instead, we are left to wonder if the bosswill ever be given the chance to honor their great-great-grandmother or if this, too, will be taken from them in the name of control.

We will not stop fighting—not just for our right to see R & G but for their right to grow up in a home where they are truly cared for. A home where they are allowed to express themselves freely, where they know they are loved without condition, and where their emotional well-being comes first. No child should be subject to this kind of manipulation, and we are committed to freeing them from it.